Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Actions speak louder than pants.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
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