Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
How does one acquire holy water?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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