Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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