I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
