An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
