He told me they were just razor bumps!
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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