The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
