Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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