I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize