I wish you could order shots online.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
