I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
