I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
