I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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