I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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