Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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