But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
