K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I touched a dick in church today
Randomize