i'm signing you up for texting rehab
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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