Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize