4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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