I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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