Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
