He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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