If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
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