Non-Jews are for practice
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
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