Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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