You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
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