when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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