I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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