sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
