Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
