You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
