we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Randomize
