Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You can't just leave with hair like that
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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