somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Randomize
