his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
