I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
