if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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