trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
