just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize