she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
