one word: firstdatebathroomanal
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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