When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
