So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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