Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
