What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Randomize
