i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
