Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Randomize
