I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
