so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
